Browns Monday Mailbag

Breaking News: Brandon Weeden just threw another interception

The Browns played a game yesterday… and it counted! That means it’s time for the first ever regular season Browns Monday Mailbag, the only Browns mail bag on the internet where the emails are 100% fake, but still find a way to be 100% blatantly honest.

Brandon Weeden managed to throw 4 interceptions and accumulated a passer rating of 5 while leading the Browns offense to 3 Phil Dawson field goals. Meanwhile, RG3 threw for 320 yards and 2 touchdowns, ran for another 42 yards, and put a hurting on the Saints down in the dome by putting 40 points on the board. So, I need to ask… you mad, bro? -Robert, Washington D.C.

Words cannot begin to describe how excited I am that the Browns held on to a few extra draft picks rather than mortgage the future on RG3. I mean, while Brandon Weeden’s performance yesterday was historically bad, the silver lining in all of this is that he can’t possibly perform any worse moving forward… right? I mean that type of logic makes sense in a way. Then again there’s the distinct possibility that our coaching staff is a bunch of mo-rons incapable of creating an offense that utilizes the skills of our playmakers while minimizing their weaknesses. So am I mad? Not really. I knew a bad performance by Weeden was coming and anyone who thought Weeden was going to look like Peyton Manning in his prime needed to have their head examined. Of course, having the chance to actually watch the RG3 performance live made me wish we had the balls to make that move. He was unbelievable.

Ya… this is looking like an epic mistake

Why does everyone keep saying Shurmur should have gone for two points? I don’t understand it. You score a touchdown and you kick the extra point. That’s how it works. Can you even go for two points in the NFL? I thought that was only a college thing. Even still, if that’s the case then there was a decision to be made and they made it and took the points. There was still an entire quarter to go essentially. That’s me being genuine with my genuine opinion. Lay off Shurmur. -Pat, Cleveland

Again Pat, I can’t help but feel a bit suspicious about your undying love and support for Shurmur. It’s a little odd. That being said, Shurmur is an idiot, doofus, moron, big dummy, what have you. Yes, there was an entire quarter to play, but when you have a chance to go for two and push your lead to either 3 or 7 that’s what you do. You do it because then later on in the game… say at the end of the quarter you’re in… at worst a field goal or touchdown doesn’t beat you. Instead, you go to overtime. What difference would it have made being up only 5 rather than 6? If they had gone for two and made it then it’s 17-17 and maybe it goes to overtime. And that’s just one of Shurmur’s big mistakes on the day. There were others, but it was that one that seemed so simple and yet he made seem like rocket science.

Two points? You can do that in the NFL?

That American flag came out of nowhere! Weeden never had a chance! It was out for blood… and vengeance! It probably also helps explain why Weeden played so poorly yesterday. You’d be rattled too if you had encountered a near death experience with a killer flag. -Brandon, Colt’s guest room

I have to admit that whole Weeden getting swallowed up by the giant American flag was pretty funny. It also should have been a sign of things to come. I mean honestly, who gets swallowed by a flag? Anyways, I don’t think that explains Weeden’s issues. It probably had more to do with his lack of experience and the speed and tempo of a regular season NFL game. Again, can and will he get better? It seems likely that he will, at least we all hope. What it comes down to is limiting mistakes and taking what the defense is giving him. He forced too many throws downfield and that’s what led to him throwing 4 interceptions. The alarming stat of the game though was Weeden, whose known for his deep ball, going 0-9 on throws of 10 yards or more. He also wasn’t helped by the lack of ability from the receiving core and the ineffectiveness of Trent Richardson so it’s not 100% his fault. Regardless, Weeden needs to be better or else the cries for Colt McCoy will be loud and clear by week 4.

One would have thought things could only get better after this… boy, were we off.

So what if T-Rich didn’t have the type of debut everyone was hoping for, he’s not a miracle worker. Did you see the size of the holes the Browns offensive line was opening up? Of course you didn’t, because there were no holes. How is he supposed to do anything awesome when there’s nowhere to go? -Trent, Berea, OH

Ya, for once this was an email that actually made sense. It was a nice change from some of the other crap the litters my imaginary inbox. Bottom line being, the Browns improved offensive line was terrible. They did an awful job of creating holes and giving Richardson room to operate. On the few runs where he did have room he actually looked pretty decent. Of course T-Rich wasn’t helped at all by the fact that the passing game was non-existent. As the game wore on it was clear that if the Browns were going to score it was going to be as a result of him breaking a big run. Hard to do when there are 8 guys in the box. I thought Joe Thomas was one of the best left tackles in football. Sure didn’t seem like it yesterday. Oh, and why did Shurmur insist on sending T-Rich straight up the middle? No sweeps, no pitches, just straight up the gut each and every time.

Kurt Coleman’s helmet got into a fight with Trent Richardson… and lost

The Browns really need to give Phil Dawson a billion dollar, lifetime contract already. It’s clear that once again he’s the Browns most viable offensive weapon. In fact, when they get into the red zone they shouldn’t even bother running plays, they should just kick the field goal on first down and avoid the 6 penalties and inevitable disaster that’s sure to unfold. -Phil, Golf Course

Truer words have never been spoken. Actually they have. I remember Phil writing in back during the preseason and expressing the same general sentiment. Dawson does deserve a lifetime contract. I mean he’s been the Browns best player of the expansion era. On that note, I’m about 2 weeks away from buying a Phil Dawson jersey. First off, it would be hilarious and second, he’s the only player worthy of my money. Yes… the kicker… is our best player for 13 years running. God hates Cleveland.

Never fear, Dawson’s leg is here!
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2 thoughts on “Browns Monday Mailbag

  1. It’s true: Dawson is the Brown’s best offensive weapon with an exception of perhaps (we’ll have to wait and see) Trent Richardson, who didn’t have much of a opportunity to show what he’s all about.

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