After the debacle in Detroit last weekend, the near sweep at the hands of the Mariners, and taking two of three from Kansas City the Indians now find themselves six and a half games back of the first place Tigers and behind the White Sox for second place. The injury bug that has permeated throughout the club house this season has become a full-blown outbreak. Michael Brantley, who’s been the most consistent hitter other than Asdrubal Cabrera this year is now done for the season with a broken Hamate bone. Wonderful. Josh Tomlin… Sprained elbow… possibly done for the year. Ugh…
I think I just had an aneurysm…
All season long Manny Acta has promoted this concept of Wahoo Baseball. A brand of baseball that would be fun and exciting. It’s been fun and exciting alright. It’s also been frustrating and anger inducing at times. Unfortunately, given all that’s happened I do believe it’s time to lay Wahoo Baseball to rest. Don’t get me wrong, I’m going to keep rooting on the Indians, but it’s going to take a miracle at this point for them to catch the Tigers and win the AL Central crown. A miracle that is more a work of the macabre.
Yes folks, it’s time for… Zombie Baseball. The only way the Indians win the AL Central is to come back from the dead. The Indians need to become a metaphorical zombie apocalypse, baseball playing army. Oh yes, the Indians need to be out for blood… and brains. It’s our only hope for making the playoffs and winning the World Series. And be honest, wouldn’t it seem fitting if we won the World Series by aligning ourselves with black magic and the dark arts? I mean this is Cleveland. How else do we ever expect to win anything?
Of course it would help if the Tigers ever lost another game or 12.
The acquisition of Jim Thome is a nice story and he even hit a home run in his second game, but let’s be honest with ourselves. When we look back on this season the Thome acquisition will be nothing more than just that, a nice story. It was too little too late at this point and the Indians have been beaten and broken down after playing in what has essentially been a pennant race since July. The bodies are piling up at record pace, the offense comes and goes as it pleases, and the natives have grown more than restless.
It’s time for some voo doo, a little bit of black magic, bad joo joo… whatever the hell you want to call it. It’s time to play some Zombie Baseball!
Now quick, someone cue up “Thriller” and find me a red leather jacket. Hurry!